The Arnoldmeter: Best and Worst Super Bowl Commercials
The 2015 Super Bowl commercials proved to be a year where dads rule, Liam Neeson seeks revenge (again), Walter White lives and more heartstrings are tugged.
Top 10 Best Commercials:
10. Nationwide – “Invisible Mindy”
There were many commercials this year that featured people we loved just being themselves. Mindy Kaling’s is one of those people. Her Nationwide commercial hits the sweet spot during the game. “Invisible Mindy” is irresistibly charming and funny, plus, a cameo appearance by Matt Damon.
9. Kia – “The Perfect Getaway”
What’s better than getting an action adventure commercial by former 007, Pierce Brosnan? Offering us a Brosnan satire of his former spyhood, “The Perfect Getaway” pokes fun at Brosnan’s action junkie demeanor, by not letting him have his way. Turning his sniper into an owl or his rocket launcher into a moose. By hey, at least he gets to keep the car, right?
8. Snickers – “The Brady Bunch”
Snickers has finally gone back to its comedic roots. A parody of the Brady Bunch with Danny Trejo playing Marcia Brady who is angry that Peter hit her in the nose with a football before the school dance. Snickers perfectly timed the belly laughs all the way up to Trejo slamming his axe on the table. And with Steve Buscemi making a last-minute hilarious appearance, this commercial couldn’t have gone wrong. Move over Skittles!
7. Dove Men+Care – “#RealStrength”
This one-minute commercial tugs at every father’s heartstrings. We see kids big and small calling out to their fathers. From hugs to kisses to tears, we see it all. This commercial reminds us the responsibility as father and the pleasures dads take in seeing their children grow and mature. So what makes a man stronger? Showing that he cares.
6. Microsoft – “Braylon O’Neill”
Incredibly touching and heartfelt, Microsoft’s “Empowering Us All” shows us a real life story of 6-year-old Braylon O’Neill, who is missing the tibia and fibula bones in both of his legs. O’Neill still plays sports and thrives off of Microsoft technology. This passionate and well-narrated piece is a commercial that everyone should see.
5. Jeep – “Beautiful Lands”
Jeep lands a spot at No. 5 for showing us the beauty of our world. The commercial travels all over the Earth displaying our uniqueness and diversity of the human race. The scenery was blended together perfectly with the well-known folk song, “This Land Is Your Land,” by Woody Guthrie. Jeep empowers us to think outside the box toward the elegance of globalism and multiculturalism. Bravo Jeep.
4. Toyota – “My Bold Dad”
Another commercial about dads and it succeeded. This commercial shows us a father daughter relationship that is raw and moving. Again Toyota is showing the beauty of fatherhood and the choice of being a great and loving father. There are moral lessons galore in these dad commercials, and they hit home hard.
3. Budweiser – “Lost Dog”
Budweiser’s “Lost Dog” is the true crowd pleaser of 2015. Following up on last year’s clear winner, “Puppy Love,” Budweiser makes a sequel to our beloved furry pals. This time though, we get a lost puppy that manages to find his way home. But when he finally arrives a fierce wolf comes into the picture. No need to worry because the puppy’s friendly Clydesdales come to the rescue. This one may not have been as good as its predecessor, but “Lost Dog” is undoubtedly still sweet. Bud even parallels one of its final shots with one of 2014’s shots. Bud knows how to bring home the fireworks and it’s a beaut to watch.
2. Clash of Clans – “Revenge”
I am not big on downloading games for my Smartphone, but seeing “Clash of Clans” do a parody of the “Taken” franchise made me laugh so hard. Liam Neeson reprises his role, as he satires himself as the iconic baddy you don’t want to mess with. When Neeson loses to BigBuffetBoy85, he growls and rolls in non-stop laughter with his sly choice of words: “I don’t know you, BigBuffetBoy85, but if you think you can humiliate me, think again.” The commercial gets even funnier when the barista mispronounces Neeson’s first name. Don’t mess with AngryNeeson52!
1. Esurance – “Say My Name”
Heisenberg lives! Every “Breaking Bad” fan, like myself, probably flipped Sunday night when they saw Walter White make a truly awesome appearance as a pharmacist for Esurance. Bryan Cranston returns as the iconic hero turned bad, yellow jumpsuit and all. The commercial starts out with a woman coming by to pick up her prescription, but ends up meeting Greg (Cranston). Well sorta Greg. Poking fun at his character, Cranston even uses one of his most famous lines, “Say My Name,” to the woman. Esurance just redefined the word “awesome” and has my pick for best Super Bowl commercial of 2015. Long live Heisenberg!
Top 5 Worst Commercials:
5. Nationwide – “Make Safe Happen”
We see a young boy doing various activities (riding a bike, flying in the sky, getting kissed by a girl) throughout the commercial, but saying all throughout he can never accomplish these goals in life because he’s, wait for it, dead. What? My God, that was depressing. Nationwide totally killed the joyous mood of the Super Bowl … talk about a buzzkill. This is not a bad commercial, but it’s not one you show at the Super Bowl. I’m sorry Nationwide, but it’s 2015, don’t go all M. Night Shyamalan on us. Good grief.
4. Game of War – “Who Am I”
I am so done with Kate Upton. Only immature horny teenage boys would find this mess of a commercial attractive. The “Game of War” ads are completely pointless because if you have seen one jiggling Upton ad, then you have pretty much seen them all. Moving on.
3. T-Mobile – “#KimsDataStash”
If there is anything worse than Upton, it’s Kim Kardashian. Kim tries to poke fun at her narcissism, but let’s be honest, who really cares at this point? Answer: No one.
2. Jublia – “Tackle It”
And if there is anything worse than seeing Upton and Kardashian on the TV, it’s disgusting toe fungus. Gross! Should I say anymore? Whoever came up with this bright idea to waste $4.5 million should be fired.
1. NCADA St. Louis – “That’s How”
Only STL residents saw this truly awful and possibly offensive PSA, but it was, hands down, the worst of Super Bowl 2015. Poorly filmed and executed, the NCADA tries to educate us on the destruction of heroin with a catchy jingle. Wait what? Trying to show the dangers of drugs is one thing, but to sap it up with a crappy jingle is another. The NCADA took a serious topic and turned it into a catchy showtune, which is completely inappropriate. What’s worse than watching this horrible PSA? Trying to get that repulsive jingle out of your head.