What would kill you first, drinking rotten eggnog or enduring another Kirk Cameron film? After watching this latest disaster, I say pass the nog.

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From television sitcom,”Growing Pains,” to the unbearable hooky Christian films, Kirk Cameron and his ego need to leave the acting business now.

Grinding my teeth while I write this review, I will break it down into two parts: a cinematical perspective and an ideological perspective. Barely 80 minutes long, “Kirk Cameron’s “Saving Christmas” feels more like a poorly made project by a high school AV class on amateur hour.

Cameron and his group of heathens give us probably one of the least joyful holiday films ever made. The film is shot, written and acted so inadequately, you’re numb by the end of the 80 minutes.

With stiff performances, flat jokes and an overlong dance sequence/hip-hop number of “Angels We Have Heard on High,” “Saving Christmas” is one of the worst films of 2014. A little part of you dies inside.

Director and co-writer, Darren Doane sends us to a Christmas party where we meet him as a character, conveniently named Christian, who is angry with the way Christmas has become.

At this cheerful party, we see jolly kids running around, a man dressed up as Santa, a stereotypically cheeky black friend and Kirk Cameron! Good gracious.

Cameron wants to know why his brother-in-law, Christian, is so upset during the holiday season. Most of the film, I kid you not, takes place in a car with two guys babbling on and on. Christian is upset because Christmas apparently, to him, has turned into a materialistic orgy.

He says there is no reference to Christmas trees or Santa Claus in the Bible because they are all pagan traditions. Have no fear, Kirk Cameron is here!

Cameron then proceeds to explain to Christian that the Christmas tree and Santa are, in fact, in the Bible. Apparently, these pagan traditions of Mr. Claus and the trees are just a myth.

So Cameron hams away at selective Scripture trying to prove his point to Christian. Don’t mind the religious and historical teachings that prove Cameron’s arguments are obviously invalid and wrong.

Nothing will get past Cameron’s thick skull, so just nod your head and move on. I am not lying when I tell you that this film is beyond awful … it’s down right ludicrous!

Not to mention the film received five Razzie Awards, including Worst Picture, Director, Screenplay, Actor and Screen Combo (Cameron and his ego).

So what would kill you first, drinking rotten eggnog or enduring another Kirk Cameron film? Let me just say, I’ll take my chances with the eggnog …

Zero Stars

By Ryan Arnold

Ryan Arnold is Arts & Entertainment Editor for MBU Timeline, as well as Web Administrator for the site. He is majoring in broadcast media and minoring in religion at Missouri Baptist University. Arnold runs cross-country and track and field at MBU. Arnold has always had a passion for film and likes to shoot and edit film. Arnold wants to have a career in video production after college. In his spare time, Arnold also runs his own blog, "Arnold At The Movies." Checkout all of my reviews at http://ryanarnoldreviews.weebly.com/